A prompt from Georgia Welly today. She hates “terms and Conditions – nobody ever reads them and it seems like a great waste of the written word.” So here is my attempt at some terms and conditions.
Terms & Conditions:
1. Reading
1.1 The subject is only required to read the sections they find entertaining.
2. Printing
2.1 In the event the subject finds the terms and conditions boring the subject must print the terms and conditions and fold them into a hat. Please see the appendices for origami instructions.
3. Workplace
3.1 If the subject is reading the terms and conditions in the workplace they must pretend the reading is hard work and
3.2 If the subject finishes the document at work they must reward themselves with a communal biscuit.
3.3. If the subject does not have access to communal treats, the subject is required to steal a treat of a co-worker from the fridge or at the least buy something from the vending machine.
4. Commitment
4.1 If the subject is still reading at this point in the document, the subject should know the author is single.
4.2 If the subject enjoys sci-fi, comedy and listening to the dulcet tones of a snort laugher the subject may consider calling 036745745
4.3 If the subject calls the aforementioned number but enjoyed the Phantom Menace the author reserves the right to at any point terminate the call.
[ ] Tick box to agree to terms and conditions
Also…some terms and conditions of my own… please don’t call that made up number- I cannot guarantee a humorous nerd will answer.
freyawrightbrough 