Last night at a birthday drinks I was told “tomorrow you have to write a Dr. Seuss style poem about yourself!” by someone I’d basically just met. My enthusiasm for the project was starting to wane, but it’s always rekindled by people shouting, tweeting, facebooking and carrier pigeon-ing me funny challenges. Okay I haven’t had the last one yet but I’d love to!
Anyway Rohan (don’t know your last name) here is your poem. As you wish! (Yes Princess Bride reference)
Who is this girl you may ask?
The idiot who set this ridiculous task.
Born 1991. Nicknamed ‘freya-tuck’ the fat roly-pole
But grew into more of a spindly, clumsy new born foal
As she got older she fended and friended her way through life
Got through school, jobs and uni without too much strife
She’s written, re-written, been smitten, bitten, likes to listen, had a kitten,
never been christened and has a crazy family from Britain.
She seems to be physically dyslexic and was shy at school
It’s amazing she has so many friends and doesn’t look more of a fool
She’s scared of confrontation, gated communities, drowning and spiders
She loves television, the smell of rain, funny laughs and trying new ciders
She wants to be a writer but she thinks she’s pretty rough
Maybe not good enough
She’s hoping this challenge will help her write better stuff
Perhaps she’ll even make a name as Freya Wright-Brough
And hopefully no-one will call her bluff